Healthy Marriage

For too many women today in our communities marriage is no longer consider an option. For some marriage is no longer a requirement or a desire for raising children. They have accepted the false belief that having fathers involved in the raising of children is nice to have but not a requirement. Too often we hear women referring to men as merely "sperm donors" and they have little, if any belief that the men will be involved in the children’s lives. It is unfortunate but for many women if it were not for their children there would be no one in their lives and so rather than living lives of solitude they become mothers with little or no expectation of support from the men they procreate with.

"Cohabitation has some but not all of the benefits of marriage," said Linda Waite, the association’s president, in an address to members in which she argued that the married enjoy better health, more money and more satisfying sex.

An enhanced commitment that comes naturally with marriage, she said, increases all levels of the support that individuals bring to their relationship and lives. "Cohabitation does not generally imply a lifetime commitment to stay together," she said. "Cohabitants are more likely to assume that each partner is responsible for supporting him or herself."

Dr. Waite, a professor of sociology at the University of Chicago whose research focuses on family structure, drew from various resources in her work, including the National Survey of Families and Households, a sampling of 13,000 adults, which was conducted in the late 1980’s, with a follow up in the early 1990’s

In terms of money, her research found that married couples were generally more financially well off than couples who simply lived together, because they were much more likely to pool money and invest in the future than were couples who merely cohabitated.

Increased material well being, she argued, trickles down into investments in better medical care, safer surroundings, better food and other things that raise the standard of living and reduce stress.

Dr. Waite also traced better health to marriage. Divorced men, her study showed, had twice the rate of alcohol abuse that married men had, and almost as many indulged in other "risk taking" behavior. Divorced women showed similar patterns, though at lower rates.

"Marriage may provide individuals with a sense of meaning in their lives," Dr. Waite said, "and a sense of obligation to others, inhibiting risky behaviors and encouraging healthy ones."

Her audience seemed most interested in the fact that married people report having more and better sex than single people have.

She cited the 1992 National Health and Social Life survey to support the notion that a readily available and willing married partner resulted in married men having sex twice as frequently as most of the single men surveyed, and the married men reported higher levels of satisfaction with their sex lives than either single or cohabitating men. She attributed this to the partners’ investment in "skills" to please one specific person, and to an emotional investment in a relationship that should result in increasing the frequency and quality of sex

Men appear to have the most to benefit from marriage, the study showed. They tend to make more money, perhaps because they have the incentive of another person. Dr. Waite said that divorced men had higher rates of drug and alcohol abuse and depression than single or married men or than single, married or divorced women.*

* New York Times

Benefits of Healthy Marriages for Children and Youth

Researchers have found many benefits for children and youth who are raised by parents in healthy marriages, compared to unhealthy marriages, including the following:

More likely to attend college
More likely to succeed academically
Physically healthier
Emotionally healthier
Less likely to attempt or commit suicide
Demonstrate less behavioral problems in school
Less likely to be a victim of physical or sexual abuse
Less likely to abuse drugs or alcohol
Less likely to commit delinquent behaviors
Have a better relationship with their mothers and fathers
Decreases their chances of divorcing when they get married
Less likely to become pregnant as a teenager, or impregnate someone
Less likely to be sexually active as teenagers
Less likely to contract STD’s
Less likely to be raised in poverty

For Women

Researchers have found many benefits for women who are in healthy marriages, compared to unhealthy marriages, including the following:

More satisfying relationship
Emotionally healthier
Wealthier
Less likely to be victims of domestic violence, sexual assault, or other violent crimes
Less likely to attempt or commit suicide
Decrease risk of drug and alcohol abuse
Less likely to contract STD’s
Less likely to remain or end up in poverty
Have better relationships with their children
Physically healthier

For Men

Researchers have found many benefits for men who are in healthy marriages, compared to unhealthy marriages, including the following:

Live longer
Physically healthier
Wealthier
Increase in the stability of employment
Higher wages
Emotionally healthier
Decrease risk of drug and alcohol abuse
Have better relationships with their children
More satisfying sexual relationship
Less likely to commit violent crimes
Less likely to contract STD’s
Less likely to attempt or commit suicide

For Communities

Researchers have found many benefits for communities when they have a higher percentage of couples in healthy marriages, compared to unhealthy marriages, including the following:

Higher rates of physically healthy citizens
Higher rates of emotionally healthy citizens
Higher rates of educated citizens
Lower domestic violence rates
Lower crime statistics
Lower teen age pregnancy rates
Lower rates of juvenile delinquency
Higher rates of home ownership
Lower rates of migration
Higher property values
Decreased need for social services

Why Marriage Matters, Second Edition: Twenty-Six Conclusions from the Social Sciences