When motherhood becomes the fruit of a deep yearning, not the result of ignorance or accident, its children will become the foundation of a new race.
The primary cause of generational poverty in America today is the breakdown of marriage. Or to put it in a somewhat more sophisticated formulation to forestall some rebuttals, the primary cause of poverty in America today is a breakdown in culture, in which out of wedlock childbirths is the most visible symptom.
The evidence is clear and conclusive as the numbers of out of wedlock child births have increased so has the poverty rate. And we have seen the number of out of wedlock child births explode over the last few decades in the black community. It has become so acceptable in our community that it is not just the young and uneducated who are doing it, it is also the more mature and educated women. I recently read an article that said that the problem is not unmarried women having babies; it is that married black women are having fewer babies and it is distorting the data. So having almost 80% of black children being born and raised by single female heads of household is no reason to become alarmed and that it does not mean there has been a change in values or morals for black people.
On the surface this seems plausible. I mean if married black women stopped having babies all together then 100% of black children would be born to single female head of households. But what it does not take into account is the damage that these births cause to our community. The concept or sacrament of marriage has almost been eliminated from our community. Despite the mountain of data that suggests that children born to single female heads of households do poorly in school, commit more crimes, are more likely to become single parents themselves, engage in sex earlier, have more difficulty finding and keeping jobs, have more drug and alcohol problems, etc. These children who are often raised in poverty on average continue to live in poverty their entire lives. Now many will blame some form of racism for this phenomenon, but the truth is that it is the family structure that is more to blame.
What folks from past generations knew and we have lost sight of is that marriage sanctifies the children and it covers them. And children require that covering for healthy outcomes. God never intended for children to be born and raised in the manner they are being raised today and based on the current outcomes it is easy to see why. You see a person should not have children for what the children will give to the person; companionship, self-worth, someone to love, etc. This to me is an extreme form of selfishness which ignores the needs of the child and only focuses on the need of the parent. A person should want to be a parent for what they can provide to their child; security, love, protection, provisions, etc. Unfortunately, we have allowed this selfish behavior on the part of women to not because of what they can provide to their children, but what their children can provide to them.
As we approach and celebrate another Mother’s Day, my prayer is that the black community will begin to confront, educate, and denounce the annihilation of marriage that has gripped our community. Children without marriage are an affront to God and leads to an unsustainable family structure that is wrought with adverse consequences for our children. If you really love your unborn children then wait until you can provide a stable family for them to grow and prosper in. We talk about people today as if they have no control over their lives or their bodies, as if they were beasts in the field. And we use this reasoning for justifying all types of damaging behavior. Yes people can wait to get married before having children, it has been proven. To my friends who are pro-choice, choice begins before the decision to seek an abortion. The choice began when you decided to participate in an act whose sole purpose is to create life. Why should anybody be shocked when a life is produced?